I will always choose the bear.
Life has demonstrated that there are worst forms of violence than that which instinct elicits.
I speak to the violence that seeks to steal, kill, and destroy… for sport.
There is no comparison when confronted with a predatory nature that is conscious, cold, and calculating.
The predator that chooses to be violent, even when unprovoked.
The individual that chooses to harm without any visible threat.
It requires personal experience… to understand the cruelty and destructiveness that can stem from simply stating the word, “No.”
You failed to understand the prize in my attention. You failed to consider the importance of my position. That I even noticed you, chose to see you — is beneath me. Yet still I stand here, with chivalry, asking you to see me. Wanting you to please me. Seeking confirmation, to claim what is already mine. You cannot think you can walk away from me. To choose someone other than me, not in your or my lifetime.
There has been punishment.
Withstood and endured for standing my ground.
There has been suffering and acceptance, as my world came crashing down.
With lies spun, and gossip spread, I watched in horror, but could not make a sound.
And the discrediting became distance… and the isolating silence was the precursor to my premeditated destruction.
I was to be alone, without a friend to phone, without a lifeline to call.
There would be a cost to pay, for having the audacity and the gall…
To say no.
There was to be no coming back, no recovery from each destructive and debilitating blow.
How are you still standing? How are you still speaking? You should have nothing to show. You keep evading me, but there’s something you need to know.. I will not stop. There will be no end, until the end of you. There will be no peace. I have every right to do what I’ve done to you. You failed to to kiss my outstretched hand. Now I demand your back to break, I demand your life to end.
It will not. My life will go on.
I have kicked, and screamed, and cried.
My voice will not be silenced, my fate was never any person’s to decide.
I have pushed, and raged, and fought.
I will stand in alignment, my love and affection will not be bought.
And still I wish I had the fortune, to instead have crossed paths with a bear.
Odds would have it that regardless of what took place, it would not have been the bruised egos of men, who sought to turn my life into a nightmare.
I dedicate this blog to my aggressors:
Scott Rutherford of Rotman's School of Management at the University of Toronto, also a senior leader at McKinsey & Co Canada and
Alex Lamb with the Royal Canadian Mountain Police (RCMP).
May neither of you ever have another opportunity to destroy a woman for turning down your advances.
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