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When Someone Tells You Who They Are, Believe Them

I choose to believe.

I do not feel inclined to challenge, comfort, or offer an alternative perspective.

When people tell me who they are and their self-portrayal pains my ears.

Their thinly veiled self-hatred sears my soul.

My heart bled and still bleeds when remembering the weight of it.

Yet still, I nod my head in acknowledgment, when they say that they’re no good.

I quietly accept.

Despite the core description of who they see themselves as being,... is negative and forlorn.

My emotions notwithstanding, it is not my place to question someone’s sense of self.

Rather than fix, mend, and heal, first choose to respect. Allow experience, and maturity, to impart that it is not our role to change the narratives that others write about themselves. How anyone chooses to see themself is always fundamentally their call. A bleeding heart always trying to lend a helping hand, so focused on the healing others, they neglect their own open wounds.

Acknowledge your sense of discomfort, decipher what’s driving your desire to soothe, or your desire to change someone’s point of view.

Rather than sympathize, choose to empathize.

Shift your focus to establishing healthy boundaries.

Empathy gives you the space to resolve to maintain distance.

Empathy offers clarity in the understanding, that If you do not see the good in you, I cannot expect that you’ll save the best for me.

Empathy allows the recognition that the best that someone who chooses to live tormented would have in store, could never be what serves me, or what supports me on my journey.

I am committed to my healing.

Those who finds solace in self-loathing cannot be deemed compatible.

Because your misery loves company.

I am perpetually unavailable to create harmony and symphony in undue suffering.

I will forever cut ties with those who make melody out of chaos and calamity.

Someone’s self-destruction is never an open invitation. Anyone who frames themselves in self-hatred, is not secretly crying for help, or hoping for charity in external validation - they are simply communicating their truth. Choosing to disregard that honesty in exchange for a narrative that you deem a “better fit” is begging for disaster.

A desire for healing comes from within.

The process of healing is a personal and individual journey that one must commit to with or without… community.

The ego rears her face, she hides behind the pretence of good intentions.

She dismisses self-preservation and subjects herself to harm for the chance to be the hero.

She seeks out those who are drowning and forgets she never learned how to swim.

Playing the role of saviour, is how she gets the win.

She ignores her own need for healing, and distracts herself with the pain of others.

Listen to the ego, and you have more to lose than what you’ll gain.

Healing is a journey, a choice we commit to every day.

In time you’ll find community, with those who’ve healed and are healing their own way.

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